Last week was the first time in a long time, I stayed home alone. My children went to sea side with my family for a week and my husband left for a business trip. Even though my family suggested for me to go with them (which I believe would be fun) and my husband asked me to join at his trip (which I know would end up being “us” time), I decided I needed a break from everyone. I much needed “me” time, which I haven’t had in years, to gather my thoughts and my own energy. Since giving birth to my younger daugther Eva (3years old), I haven’t had my own time, without anyone, being able to just do whatever without any distraction. For the longest time I contemplated if I shoould take time off and not to mention sense of guilt of leaving children. When in January I joined Betterlifestyle team and my blog and once again went on a journey where I will make my own career, I was comitted that this time I will not give in and promised myself I will know in what situations and how I will put my self first. Before I usually always somehow gave in to my loved ones and their needs and often forgot what I need as a woman, not only as a mother or wife. All these years my family was first. I started feeling overwhelmed and like I am living other peoples lives, giving my energy away and juggle with how to keep up with my own.I realized we all need breaks sometimes. I am no different. And most of all, I relaized that nothing bad is going to happen and that I can still be good mother and good wife, even better one, if I take care of my own needs as well. Especially working mothers, or any mothers, especially ones with small children are the ones that do need to have break, to restore energy and keep their sanity.
So this one week break was long aniticpated and I decided I will use it as much for my own interests and what I like to do. That is why I decided I will not go to groceriess all week, I won’t do any dishes,I won’t reorganize house, I won’t do laundry, I won’t cook and prepare any meals, no housework, period.This was so liberating. To be at home and do asbolutely none of housework. I took time for some Betterlifestyle work, I took time to see some friends I haven’t seen for a long time, to visit my friend who just gave birth of a new baby, I went to a bachelorette party, I partied , I read, I slept, I shoped and even took a trip to Venice. This week got me thinking why in our culture (I compare myself to my Slovenian friends), we think we need to be perfect mothers, wifes, workers and houskeepers. Why in our culture majority believe that most of family work needs to be done by woman. Why when your man or grandparents helps you, it is treated like he/they are doing a favor to you? It is acutally not a favor, but taking your part of responsibilty of being a parent or grandparent.It is showing your child or grand child that you love them, that you want to engage with them, that you care for them. And because everyone needs to realize, that while it is the best job ever to be a mother, it is also necesarry to have a break, and be able to have a time where you re not engaged in any of your children needs and being on call. I admit without any sense of guilt, I didn’t miss my daugthers on my “off” week, I didn’t miss my husband, but a day when they were expected to arrive, I was ecxcited to prep the house, do grocerries, to make their favourite meal and to give them all my energy and love. I realized that when I get time off to rest and recuperate my energy, I am better mother and wife.